Monday, September 8, 2014

The End of the World, As I Know It

Four days ago I was ready to leave!  I think it had something to do with the skunking incident, plus the rain plus the fact I was just plain tired.  I wanted to go "home".  There comes a time in every summer when I am ready to go home.  It usually happens when I am tired and usually on a rainy day.  I think to myself, "I'm ready to leave, I'm ready for air conditioning, eating out at restaurants, retail stores within two miles, mindless television, city water and sewage, and last but certainly not least, college football."  Usually I get over this phase on the next sunny day when I am reminded how beautiful it is up here at this time of year and I remember how hot and humid it still is back home.

Serenity next door at the pond 

Last night I had a dream, more accurately... a nightmare.  I am not a psychiatrist nor do I play one on television but if I were one who analysed dreams this one would be a doozy!  In my dream I was outside chatting with friends in a driveway of one of our former residences and I noticed an interesting cloud formation.  That cloud formation turned out to be a mushroom cloud!

An image that might just wake you up from a sound sleep too!
In my dream I remember thinking, "Cool clouds....wait, that looks like an explosion!  Oh SH*#, what do I do now?"  I woke up immediately  from my dream and drifted in and out of sleep for the rest of the night.  All night I thought about what I should do or would do in the case of a nuclear explosion.  These are not sleep inducing thoughts.  I also had the song by R.E.M., "It's The End Of The World As We Know It" running through my mind all night long.  Not much sleep happened! Do you know how hard it is to sleep when you are thinking about why you dreamed up a nuclear explosion and what you would do if there were one?  Do I run to my family, do I drop to my knees and start praying and ask for forgiveness for all the wrongs I've done, do I run and help those who need it, do I just run for cover and hide?  These are the thoughts that ran through my all too awake head last night.

This morning in the light of day, whew, I figured out what this dream must mean, because even though I don't play a psychiatrist on TV, I will stay at a Holiday Inn this week.  On the eve of my two day marathon of packing and closing up the house for the season, I am looking at the end of my life as I've known it for the last three months.  Eureka!

Sadly, my summer of sandbar walks, large quantities of fresh garden produce right outside my back door, simple living among family and friends is coming to it's inevitable end.  POW!  Just like that it will be all over on Wednesday, until next year.

no more sandbar sunsets
no more garden fresh veggies
no more fresh cut flowers all over the house
no more beautiful peaceful commute's the end of the world as we know it..........and I feel fine.   I guess.

1 comment:

Carol said...

I am sobbing! Your analogy of your dream/nightmare was spot on. I try to disengage myself, to some extent, from That Life, after I leave. (It is too hard on the heart to think too much about it). I am heartened to read, no matter how long you are there, the pain when you leave is tremendous. Heart wrenching. Tear inducing. Painful. We all pray the summer of 2015 sees us up there, savoring it all.

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