Hope Springs Eternal

This post is dedicated to my family and friends who find themselves longing for "the shore" these days.  For over 10 years I have written at least five posts a year about the shore.  It is one of my favorite things to write about!   Last year, there were no posts about the shore and that makes me sad so I decided if I can't be there I will just write about it.  During the off season, "the shore" is either a fresh memory that gives our life perspective and energy, a sometimes forgotten memory because we are so busy in our "real" lives, or a highly anticipated summer event that gets us through the last month (or months, for those of you who live in the north) of winter and to the end of the school year.  This is often the time of year we look at our calendars and plan our summer migration.  Some of you are knee deep in snow and the thought of walking the warm, sunny, sandy beach is enough to get you through another freezing winter day.  Some of us are tired of looking out at the brown grass and the brown trees and are ready for some bright green grass, blue skies and salty breezes.  Most of us, this year especially, are tired of being in our own homes and would do anything to sit on the sandbars with the usual suspects and talk about everything and nothing all day long.

Blue skies, green grass and salty air
May 2019

Last year at this time we were just beginning life with Covid.  We were all going to stay home for 2 weeks and it was going to stop the spread.  We all know how that worked out.  We continued to have some hope through the spring that things would get under control by the summer and we would still be able to visit our beloved shore.  One year later, here I sit still wondering if we will be able to visit our beloved shore and I am not alone in this wondering.  The mental motivation that is provided every year by merely anticipating our summer migration is enough to keep me going and bring a smile to my face.  I must admit, this year my smile is guarded and a bit tense....not really a smile at all, more of a sigh hidden behind a mask.  

The last blog post I wrote about the shore was on September 19, 2019 after Hurricane Dorian blew through and left a mess in her wake.  It was also right before we left the shore for what we expected to be 8 or 9 months...not 2 years!  I think about this and wonder, "What condition did we leave our cottage and the farmhouse in under those extreme circumstances?".  We left with our yard full of giant fallen trees.  We left with roofs that needed patching.  We left after a week of dealing with my parents and expediting their departure after the storm.  We closed their cottage...did we do a good enough job to last 2 years?  Are there several families of rodents living comfortably in my basement or shed?  Will I need boots and a snow shovel to get through the dead fly corpses in my house?  What "non perishable" food items did I leave behind that have perished in scary ways over the last 2 years?  My hope is that we can find out the answers to these questions this summer.  Hope springs eternal.

The past year has been heavy.  First a pandemic began.  Then the pandemic got worse.  Then there was a summer without our beloved shore.  Then...the pandemic got worse.  There was a whole lot of hate flying around before, during and after the election and that hate is toxic for everyone regardless of your political affiliation. Then my Dad passed away.  The pandemic continued and we all continue to miss our friends, our neighbors, our families, our freedom to go out (choose your "out"...shopping, sporting events, the gym, work, school, dinner, movie, wedding, funeral, inside a friend's house...the list goes on!) without risk of getting sick or getting someone else sick. We kept going through life though, because that is what we do!  With the vaccine rollout there is a glimmer of hope.  

Reading about the last month at the shore in 2019 I found exactly what I needed today. I encourage you to read it, right here...right now, and come back after you read it.  It is that fresh breeze I wanted to store away for just the right time and that time is now.  I really miss the epic sunsets, the people, bonfires, the beach, fried clams and coconut cream pie, driving along the shore road and the inexplicable feelings stirred in my heart whenever I am there.

I read my Mixed Emotions post (just in case you didn't already read it) and got to the part about cutting my Dad's hair and it stopped me in my tracks.  I had cut his hair and beard a few more times over the past year and every time made me pause and feel the intimacy of the moment.  I would cut it again today if I could!  We all thought 2019 may have been his last summer at the shore.  He will make one final trip to the shore where he will rest forever in his favorite place on earth.  It might be this year...and then again...it might not.

It is very strange to have "going to the shore" a certainty for so many summers of my life to it being such an uncertainty.   My spring time longings for the shore have a caveat again this year.  Will the border open to us or won't it?  The million dollar question.  We have a bit of hope but unlike last year, we are under no delusions that our hopes will become reality. So...this spring I will make a solid Plan B and hope I need to cancel those National Park reservations!  One of us is fully vaccinated and the other is on every waiting list she can manage to get her name on!  One step closer to the end and the beginning.